Complaint department.

A man gets on a plane with 6 kids.
The flight attendant asks, "Are these your kids?"
The man replies, "No, I work for Trojan and these are customer complaints!"

Dance for me, Bitch.

I've done this type of blog meme a few times before on blogs I've had, in the past. I came across it here again the other day. I'm bored so I'm doing it yet again.
 
 The basic idea is to put your music playing device on shuffle and post the first 20 songs it plays. Skipping songs is silly. If you're emberrassed about a song you enjoy, you obviously don't enjoy it enough.
So, here goes:

1) Tattooed Dancer - Ozzy Ozbourne
2) Comin' Through - Killer Dwarfs
3) Why Trust You - Alice Cooper
4) In Touch (with your feminine side) - Alice Cooper
5) I Just Wanna - Kiss
6) I Wanna Rock - Twisted Sister
7) Land of Confusion - Disturbed
8) Chicks Equal Trouble - Motley Crue
9) I Almost Told You That I Loved You - Papa Roach
10) Metal Health - Quiet Riot
11) (I hate) Everything About You - Ugly Kid Joe
12) Better Of Two Evils - Marilyn Manson
13) Well I Guess - Porkchop Sandwich
14) What We're All About - Sum 41
15) The New Shit - Marilyn Manson
16) Brutal Planet - Alice Cooper
17) Panhandlin' Prince - Ugly Kid Joe
18) This Ain't a Love Song - Motley Crue
19) The Beautiful People - Marilyn Manson
20) Balls To The Wall - Accept

I'm still bored, so I'm going to keep going until I get tired of this.

21) Mother Fucker of The Year - Motley Crue
22) Woke Up This Morning - Nazareth
23) Fuck That - Kid Rock
24) S.M.F. - Twisted Sister
25) Burnin' Our Bed - Alice Cooper
26) (S)aint - Marilyn Manson
27) Life is Beautiful - Sixx AM
28) Whoop There it is - Tag Team
29) First Band on The Moon - Motley Crue
30) Dirty Dreams - Alice Cooper

Bored enough to stop yet. Yeah, me neither.....

31) Self Esteem - The Offspring
32) Neighbor - Ugly Kid Joe
33) Vengence - Alice Cooper
34) Get Naked - Methods of Mayhem
35) Devils Daughter - Ozzy Ozbourne
36) Take it Off - Kiss
37) Cherry Pie - Warrant
38) She Ain't Pretty - The Northern Pikes
39) Bed of Nails - Alice Cooper
40) He's Back (the man behind the mask) *Theme song from Friday the 13th part VI - Jason lives* - Alice Cooper

I don't know about you, but I think I've had enough.
For now.

Use two hands

An Amish farmer walking through his field notices a man drinking from his pond, with his hand.

The Amish man shouts: "Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen." (Which means: "Don't drink the water, the cows have shit in it.")
The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand your gibberish. Speak English, infidel!"

The Amish man says: "Use two hands, you'll get more!!"

I'm Awesome!

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

wet and happy

A rooster and a cat are by a pool and the cat falls in. The rooster smiles!




The moral of this story is: Where you find a wet pussy, you'll find a happy cock!!